Today we went to get the results from my Angel.
This post isn't going to be very informative as most of the information I can't remember.
Charlie had the right amount of chromosomes but they were Broken and switched around. This was caused by something I carry. It lays dormant inside me and it causes me to have "faulty" eggs.
So basically my baby didn't develop right because of me.
Everyone says it's not my fault. But to me it is. I could have passed this along yo all my children. It could cause us to have more baby died in,the future. I feel like I've let everyone down. They gave us a name but I can't remember it. But one in top people Have it.
My aunty lost so many babies, it was something "wrong" with her, she wasn't able to sustain life in her womb without medical intervention. The number of children she lost went into double digits. Every child grieved for, and every one "her fault" as much as Charlie's genes were yours. She tried for years to have children, the battle was long and very hard for her and my Uncle. Eventually, and thanks to injections she had to administer into her tummy every day for the duration of her pregnancy, she finally had a successful pregnancy and delivered my healthy, smart, cousin. Please be kind to yourself. If my aunty despaired and blamed herself, unable to go on, my cousin wouldn't be here. She fought for him and won. You have lost Charlie, but there was nothing you could have done. Fight on for what CAN be, even though it's hard and painful. Charlie will never be forgotten, and with every medical breakthrough, less mothers will have to experience what you are experiencing. xxxx
ReplyDeleteif we have more and they get problems like Charlie did then theres nothing that can be done, no medical science can help :(
Deletethe only option is to carry to term and lost baby/have a stillbirth again or tfmr very early